autism agression – Autism Lion

I love this kiddo so much.

Last night was a very sad evening.

What was supposed to be a fun time ended with our hearts bruised, heavy, and sad.

Autism aggression is a real thing.

It can be a very scary thing.

It needs to be talked about.

Sometimes it comes on so fast, sometimes you can’t make it better or help make sense of things until it is over.

Sometimes things break and shatter, and nothing feels okay. It can be heartbreaking. The severity of it can be so much that you pray it doesn’t end in a wreck or a hospital visit.

I know we are not the only family dealing with this.

The only thing you can do is pick yourself back up, work and learn from mistakes, and try, try again.

You pray next time it will be just a little less scary.

For Eli, working on the thing that triggered the aggressive behavior and desensitize him from it, along with a LOT of conversations and open communication is the only way to help move past to make sure it hopefully doesn’t happen again.

Eli’s aggression comes from lack of communication, an anxiety disorder, and anger that flares up very quickly that makes him want to attack.

We will always work on these things every single day, giving him the tools to calm himself and express himself in a more appropriate manner.

Eli has come so far. Even though his aggressive attacks might be farther apart, the fact that he is getting bigger, makes it much more destructive.

Communicating by the use of aggression is never okay. I know Eli is capable of learning to verbally communicate and work on not getting to that “seeing red” point.

I refuse to give up or believe that he can’t overcome this. I believe he can.

I often wonder what is going on in this sweet boys head, I bet more than I could ever imagine. Eli thinks so deeply sometimes, it looks like he is lost in an ocean of endless waves. Eli is so smart, it’s no wonder why we deal with aggressive behaviors. I see mothers on social media talk about their Autistic child and how luckily their child is not aggressive. I am not one of these mothers.

I’m going to be flat out honest with you. My son can be aggressive. Extremely aggressive. Lately we have been lucky it hasn’t been so bad, and we have more better days then not thanks to trying something natural to help his anxiety. But, it has in the past been extremely bad, hospital bad. My heart is so heavy when he has a meltdown. In the past when the meltdowns have been so bad, I hold it together until it is over and then find myself locked away in my master bedroom bathroom where no one can hear, unglued with what seems like an endless stream of tears. Once they dry up, I pick myself up and move forward. If you are a mother of an aggressive autistic child, you know exactly what I am talking about. The pain that strikes through your entire body known to you as pure, gut wrenching heartache.

Have you ever thought about the saying “You are to smart for your own good”? Well, imagine being “to smart for your own good” and not being able to get the words out, tell someone, do something about it. Then you feel a surge of anxiety and like you are losing your mind. You flip out into a nervous breakdown most likely ending in something broken, or someone hurt.

People can look at Eli and think “What a brat!”, or “You just need to straighten that kid out”, or “I wouldn’t be able to put up with that.” The truth is at times I wonder if I can handle it, but all in all I know he is fighting a much stronger, bigger battle inside then I ever will. And for that, I can handle whatever comes… and I will always help calm the storms.

When Eli was diagnosed with Severe Autism, he was also diagnosed with a Severe Anxiety Disorder. Now, imagine being to smart for your own good, with a diagnosis of Autism, and anxiety.

For King (As my husband started calling him one day, which is quite fitting for Eli’s personality and his love of lions.), Sensory input helps a lot. Constantly working on how to use words and express feelings helps, and as needed but wish we didn’t, medication also helps. Eli has come so far… and I know he can go further. He is very strong willed and has surpassed things doctors have thought he wouldn’t be able to accomplish. He has goals and dreams like a lot of teens. He talks about going to college someday. We don’t know what the future holds for him, but I know he can overcome anything. He proves it everyday.

Just maybe, Slow and Steady does win the Race.

Tag: autism agression

Aggression is Never Okay

To Smart for your Own Good